Okay, here it is: a just-brief-enough picture postcard from the Life of Andy. "Enjoy" it while you can...I HATE cameras. There are also pictures of a few other people, animals and objects that play a role in the riveting drama of my existence.

Here is one of me in a menacing, colossus-like stance grimly overlooking a frigid snowscape!

With a steely gaze that could put fear into a lion.

Here's one of me with a stuffed manatee on my head!

My high school yearbook photo...do I look like a cheeseball here or what?

This is my favorite though, because I almost look attractive here.

I can't for the life of me remember who took this picture, or why.

Here's another one from high school days: I'm peeking coquettishly at the camera, my coy wide-eyed expression hinting perhaps at some unseen mischief.

And here's one taken of me after I've just woken up early in the morning...

Well okay...my hair doesn't usually look THAT bad.

A 1978 Cadillac Sedan DeVille. She may have seen better days, but she had heart.

Cadzilla, my old car

Cadzilla II, my new one

More pictures. Go on, look; you're bored anyway.

A 1988 Coupe DeVille spring edition. Ooo, what a sweet ride.

This is the box my old Halloween costume came in. The costume was a clown (plain, but apt) and was, as you can see right on the box, "Flame Retarded."

and...
AMINALS!

People like aminals, so I figured I'd throw a few in.

Alex, my crazy dog

He's sitting here as I type this, licking my dresser.

Toby, my late cat

A capybara, the world's largest rodent. They grow up to be roughly as big as a medium-sized dog. No, I don't own one...but I wish I did.

Wouldn't you just like to wrap your arms around this guy and cuddle? ...Good, he doesn't want you to either.

Click here to learn more about me now that you've seen enough (and really, I think we can all agree that this was more than enough).

Or, if you've been completely traumatized, click here to go back to the main page and skip the stuff having anything to do with me.