When lazily my weary eyes are forced slowly agape
And I look out my window and regard the bleary scape,
The beacon flame drawing my mind from the ethereal
Is the promise of my beloved bowl of cereal!

The crunchy puffs, the crispy flakes, and all those little O's!
It's with a box of mini-wheats that my heart truly goes.
Whether it's the fruit-filled square or the plump juicy raisin,
You're assured a healthful feast that always tastes amazin'!

Sublime in its simplicity, it's so easy to make
That anyone can prepare some with nary a mistake!
It isn't rocket science, so once you have milk and bowl,
Just buckle up your safety belt and let the good times roll!

I'm setting sail with Cap'n Crunch, hunting with Tony T.,
I'm flying round with Toucan Sam trying to catch Lucky!
But what's this? Could there be a dark cloud staining my blue sky?
To name my favorite cereal! How could I even try?

Oh Cracklin' Oat Bran, sure you look like cat food when you're dry,
But four dollars a box means you're a special little guy!
Oh Boo Berry, on the store shelves you can be hard to find,
But you're the only blueberry cereal of your kind!

And Cheerios! You're unsinkable it is plain to see,
But once I've had a bowl of you nobody could sink me.
Rice Krispies, the mystery behind your snap pop and crackle
Is surely one beyond the wisdom of mere men to tackle!

Pebbles! You pernicious brat! How could you make me choose
Between cocoa and fruit! Although with either I can't lose.
And although Reese's Puffs don't taste exactly like the candy
Their vague chocolate peanut butter flavor is doo-dandy.

I must confess I don't care much about some Mikey kid,
But if he's the one who brought us Life, then I'm glad he did!
And how could I forget either the Fibre or the Fruit?
They're both just swell, and eating them together is a hoot!

When the unspeakable occurs and the stuff's almost through
Your patience is rewarded with a little gift to you!
The prize, of course! What could it be? A card? Perhaps a ring?
No words are fit for those trinkets and the joy that they bring!

Mr. Kellogg, Mr. Post and Mr. General Mills,
Your gifts cannot be repaid with ten hundred dollar bills.
For cereal is king with me and others of my ilk,
So pass the cornflakes and the spoon! Has anyone got milk?

A.J.T. 4/04/2000